A New Disease

I have noticed a new disease.  I might even have it. My hope is that it is not terminal. I'm pretty sure it isn't terminal.

I-padiditis, not to be confused with androidium tablitus, is characterized by uncontrollable urges to reach for the I-pad in any one of multiple scenarios. The disease is manifest in at least three states. One state is the insatiable desire to check e-mail. A second state is obsession with digital games, while the third state has the afflicted with reading of e-books. A more severe case of I-padiditis consists of frequent internet purchases. A more advanced case, but less sever than frequent purchases is reliance on Skype and Facetime. Texting seems to be present in most forms of I-padiditis, whether through Facebook or some other form of instant messaging.

As previously mentioned, I-padiditis should not be confused with androidium tablitus. Both ailments are very similar in the way they present themselves in the patient. Close inspection of the disease carrier should properly differentiate between the two. However, it is not truly necessary to distinguish between the two as they manifest in the same way and there appears to be no known cure for either disease short of inpatient treatment. To date, no cure has been verified.

Withdrawal symptoms are severe and could be life-threatening; not for the patient, but for anybody who may be near the patient. Symptoms include nervousness, fidgetyness, sleeplessness, restlessness, constant reaching for the device, and habitual recharging.