Defining Moments Monday
Needless to say, I am deeply troubled by the entire circus
surrounding Judge Brett Kavanaugh’s Senate Confirmation Hearings and the two
allegations made against him about sexual misconduct. I do not know if the allegations against him
are true or not. Those of you reading
this don’t know either.
In no way do I want to diminish the seriousness, the
tragedy, the humiliation of victims of sexual violence or misconduct. While I studied sex crimes investigations
with the FBI and spent a fair amount of time in my policing career investigating
sex crimes, I have nothing but compassion for those who have been victimized of
this most horrific, demeaning crime. I
understand that I can never comprehend the daily agony that a person must go
through following such victimization.
I also know that alleged perpetrators are wrongly accused
and it is not a rare occasion when it
happens. My career taught me that there
are multiple reasons for false allegations made against people and that those
false allegations also have long-standing, painful consequences for those
accused of such. I suspect that all of
us at one time or another have been wrongly accused of something, not
necessarily of a sexual nature, and can have an appreciation of the sickening
feeling that overcomes one when victimized of a false allegation. Most of my former colleagues and those
currently in the law enforcement field know what it is like to be falsely
accused of wrongdoing. No matter how many
times it happens you never get used to it.
Unfortunately, it comes with the territory. And, no matter how often you are cleared of false
allegations, the cloud of doubt never goes completely away.
A defining moment came to me in my policing career when I
learned that memories can be created seemingly out of thin air. It happens.
Events that never happened can become very real in people’s minds, and
nothing one can say or prove will convince the “victim” otherwise. And, unfortunately, just like copycat crimes
that occur, copycat victimizations also happen.
I’ve seen it first-hand. I saw it
spin absolutely out of control. The self-created
victimizations come out of the woodwork.
I reiterate. I have
nothing but compassion for those who have been victims of sexual or any other
type of abuse. It is inexcusable. And while the timing of the allegations
against Judge Kavanaugh is suspect (and shame, shame, shame on Diane Feinstein
for holding this ace up her sleeve until the very last moment), I draw no
conclusions as to his participation in the allegations made against him. However, I also have compassion for those
wrongly accused of any act or crime.
At best, if Judge Kavanaugh is confirmed, even if he is
completely exonerated, he has essentially been neutered. He will join the ranks of Justice Clarence
Thomas and slide into history as irrelevant.
(By the way, I personally like Justice Thomas. There is more to him than what meets the
eye,) If shown by clear and convincing
evidence that he has committed these acts, he should be disbarred – not for
having committed them, but for lying.
Meanwhile, it is inconceivable to me that there is already talk of
impeachment of Judge Kavanaugh should his appointment to the Court be approved.
There are a number of lessons to be learned from this whole
confirmation circus. Where do I begin?
1. As Americans, we tend to jump on the latest craze as it sweeps the nation. Just like new toys that come out and are gobbled up by children, we tend to jump onto the latest social fads only to find that there is not nearly as much substance to them as what was first declared.
2. No male is safe now from #MeToo. (I have grown fearful of responding with a “me too” instead of “I agree” or “it happened to me as well.”)
3. Youthful indiscretions will come back to haunt you – or someone else.
4. While we should never blame the victim for victimization, there is something to be said for not putting yourself into dangerous situations.
5. Never, ever underestimate the power of alcohol.
6. Contrary to popular opinion, the motivation to dominate a woman is not the only reason men commit sex crimes.
7. There is something to be said for living a virtuous life.
8. As you should never judge a book by its cover you should never judge an allegation by its content.
At this point, I don’t know which outcome will be worse,
whether the allegations be proven to be true or if they are proven to be false.
